summary:A fat and ugly homeless person one days meets a girl that claims to be the omnipotent being from another world. tired of superiority towards everything, and looking for a source of entertainment, she decides to give all her godly power to the most miserable person she finds , which happens to be our main character, then send him to her home world, reborn as a new person. but as she realize that watching him being overpowered from the beginning would be quite boring ,she decides to add a little restriction to his powers...
chapter 0 : prologue
Rain sucks. why you ask ? well don t ask stupid questions. It s cold, wet, and even thought it might sometimes make its surrounding quiet , the unceasing noise it makes as it collides on hard surface is too loud for my fragile ears, especially when i am trying to sleep.
Putting aside rain and all the annoyances it brings, as i finally find the most comfortable position to falls into deep slumber on this rocky gravel, another element would add up to the reasons for my lack of sleep: voices, voices coming from the mouths of pedestrians.
Saying that they don t bother me would be a lie, especially when it s a about retarded children making all kind of retarded noises. but after 50 years, you get used to it, so in general i would just ignore them.
The kind of voices though that even a veteran such as myself coudln t ignore was the kind that was targeting me, in a direct or indirect way. I wished sometimes that it was just the result of me being too self conscious, but my keen hearing didn t allow that assumption.
- man 1 " what the hell is that thing ? "
- woman 1 " I think it s a human... ??"
- man 1 " a human ? a very large and ugly one lol "
- man 2 " kind of look like the retarded baby of some whale who had sex with a retarded jiraffe
- woman 2 " lol what ? how would that even work ? "
- man 1 " i don t know go ask him.... or her "
- man 2 " ..... or both ?"
-woman 2 " eww no way i am going near that thing , who know what i might catch "
-woman 1 " well definitely not herpes... you already caught that after fooling around with all the guys in our neighboorhood.."
-woman 2 " youuuuu.....!!!"
*man 1 and man 2 giggling*
-woman 1 " beside guys stop acting like ass holes , it s obviously an homeless person "
-woman 2 " says the girl that questioned its humanity on the first look , you hypocrite bitch! "
-woman 1 " .....what did you call me ??????? "
-man 1 " wowowwwww you 2 calm down ok ? no need to fight under this already shitty weather...."
-man 2 " i knew it wasn t a good idea to bring thoses 2 at once.... they are like water and oil =x "
-woman 2 " humph ! as i would get upset for some hoe defending some bearded snorlex on the street "
-woman 1 " anyways man 1 is right ... my clothes are getting wet .. we should hurry and go home, it s getting late
... i ll deal with that cunt later... "
-man 2 " in bed ? lolol "
man1 and 2 laughing out loud
Except from the unexpected entertaining nature of this conversation, this is mostly the kind of thing i hear when people passing-by refer to me : gross, weird, stinky, out of the world creature that should be better dead. sad isn t it ? well sometimes that crappy situation of mine awakes pity in the heart of compassionate people, but that s about it. None has ever dared to overcome fear and disgust to actually help me.
If it wasn t for my repulsive form and aggressive stench, some religious fanatics might try to approach me and recruit me into their sect, using the pretext that their god would save me from this suffering. ( which is a good strategy against simple minded people who are in a desperate situation aka most of homeless peoples )but none of that happened, which I am actually grateful for, since it would probably result in an awkward situation where i tell them to go away since i would be trying to sleep.
After the group of typical Yong adult left, night arose. The streets were finally getting silent, and as the mystic moon silently appeared from the clouds, as if it was chasing them away, and thus ending this rain, i found comfort in the moist corner of the street. That corner was my favorite spot, not only because it gave me a great view on the sky filled with shining stars, but also because it was where some high class restaurant called Food Mart ditched its trash, wish consisted mainly of dishes pre made for clients that were in excess,and wastes from dirty plates.
Before feasting i always make sure that all the light from Food Mart are off, worried that they would chase me away. I make sure as well that no stray dog or wild cat is nearby. Not that they would steal my food, attack me or anything, they would be immediately knocked down by my armor made of body odors if so. It s that they would start barking when i would be on their sight, scared of what they see, thinking i am a monster threatening their lives... This noise would alert the sleeping neighbor hood since stray animals in this part of the city almost never made noise at night, them being too busy not starving to death, or actually starving to death. Sometimes i feel bad for thoses puny creature since i am actually the reason of their starvation, me monopolizing the only spot where you could find free food , the moist corner behind FooDMart. Always fast at absorbing the half-eaten fishes, hard corn bread, nibbling on the chicken bones, i would leave nothing, except a plastic bag that was once full. In this manner , almost like a bad habit, i start eating.
Too lazy to find another place, i usually sleep into the mess i made once i am done eating. but tonight , for some reason i find enough courage to stand up and find a nearby park where i can lay down on a more comfortable bench.....
Arriving at destination, heavily breathing, sweating like i just ran an entire marathon, i lie on the promised bench like a falling tree before even catching my breath.
Physical efforts isnt my thing . Even tough i am a homeless person, i would just sit in the corner of street beside FooDMart all the time , waiting for them to trash their excess amount of food that i would just eat. As a Homeless person i was actually pretty lucky.... Or i would be if this easy way to getting free food didn t make me fat...
Exhausted, one arm falling at the side , the other rubbing my belly button, i slowly close my eyes, when i notice a figure smiling above my head.....
I was rarely surprised . In my long life i have seen almost everything, from kids killing themselves over a video game to dudes getting anally penetrated by horses. I was never scared. Even if a group of terrorist threatened to blow me up along with their c4, my laziness would just let out a yawn from my mouth instead of screams of pity for mercy. I felt both of at once. surprised and scared. The bench on wish i intended to fall asleep was already occupied by someone. What freaked me out the most though wasn t the fact that i didn t notice 'that someone' presence before settling in, or the creepy smile that contrasted with the rest of its body not identified yet, it was the miraculous fact that this person was able to sit right next to me for more than one minute without choking to death on the perpetuous stench i emit. Upon realizing that, i let out an embarrassing scream as i pitifully lose my balance from the shock and fall head first to the ground. While witnessing the pathetic state i put myself into and trying to recover from the intense pain, the mysterious shadow let out a feminine giggling; from that i deduced that whoever that person was belonged to the opposite gender, which made the whole situation even more unrealistic , since if someone ever had to approach me, the odd that it would a female were sadly close to zero.
Even tough i am used to it, being made fun of by this anonymous chick annoyed me more than usual. As a lay a first gaze upon her, about to throw at her all kind of vulgar insults, i am left speechless.
You know theses moments in movies where the protagonist see a girl and instantly get stunned by her beauty ? well i didn t believe that crap could happen in real life until now, yet i couldn t even begin to describe how pretty she was, since it seemed to goes beyond the boundaries of natural:
Silver wild long hair that shinned into the moonlight, eyes that curved in like a cat, a perfectly traced nose that was just at the right height above her smiling mouth, with the upper lip shaped at the flow of her nostril, her facial expression gave the feeling that she enjoyed toying with people. Her body was erotic. Dressed in a fantastic dark outfit that seemed to come right from one of theses rpgs i played when i was kid, the dress was smartly made to exhibit the female part, without making it lewd but still attracting the eyes of males mesmerized by theses. And i wasn t an exception..... Noticing my inability to speak up, with a very deep and manly voice, she says :
-anonymous chick with manly voice" hello there big boy~~~~ nice boner you have there "
.....Whhattttttttttttttt????????????!!!!!!!!.................i don t even..... i can t.......... what the hell was going on? i couldn t even process the reasoning behind this weird situation.... what the hell was happening?
Did FoodMart threw suspicious content into their trash which gave me hallucinating effects? If not should i be surprised by the fact that this chick had bigger balls than me or embarrassed by the fact that my first conversation with a female would have started with her commenting on my accidental erection?
-anonymous chick " fufufuf..... pfuahahahahahahah !!! "
While bursting out of laughter from my priceless reaction, the mysterious girl slowly get the high pitched voice i imagined she would would have. Seems like I was right about "her enjoying toying with people". Not once but twice she managed to ridicule me in a lap of less than 30 seconds. I was angry and ashamed, but my confusion toward the whole situation was much deeper.
Voice changing is possible for professional voice actor, but not to this extend. the way she performed it was if like she stole the vocal chords of a totally different person. it was clearly not natural.
Taking opportunity of her unceasing moment of laughter, i slowly stand up an get myself together. my accidental erection instantly gone, Scared away the moment she demonstrated her voice morphing ability, i find no need to cross my legs, trying to hide it. as i get a little back of my stolen dignity from this, in an irritated way, i ask :
- le me " who the hell are you !!?"
Still chocking on her laughter , she painfully, yet ironically answer :
- anonymous chick " your first crunch from the look of it fufufufu "
Wrong answer.. I never had a single crush in my entire. The fact that no female dared to approach me close enough to let me experience this *crush* thing might have a lot to do with it, but it was mainly for the reason that I didn t believe such things could happen: to me it was just the result of multiple physiological reactions that occurred at a certain age , mostly at teen-hood, in order to force the individual to reproduce, thus increasing the chances of the perpetuity of mankind. In other words for me, experiencing a crunch would be similar to *getting really horny*, so horny that it actually goes into your head and you start mixing that feeling with *love, as if it wanted to give its mechanism a nobler meaning other than what it really is. Even though i did get 'instantly stunned by her beauty', the only thing i felt.... And in that case miserably showed.... was sexual arousement... With this kind of mindset, taking the same ironic tone she used i reply :
-le me "yea .... right...."
Disappointed by unexpectedly boring reply, she says
- anonymous chick " hummm..... you should feel a lot more exhilarated that a pretty girl like me is taking a part of her precious time to talk to the ones likes of you ~~~~
Great now she is acting like a narcissistic queen bee .... Maybe coming to this park wasn t a good idea after all.
-le me " the like off me ? .... are you going to say next that you are from the royalty ? "
-anonymous chick " pff ! don t compare me to theses lowlifes only good ripping off poor people like you! i am far greater than that!"
I was about to ask what made her think that i would be poor, but this question was comparable of asking her if she ever heard about humility; and the answer was obvious.....
-anonymous chick " this moment must be the highlight of your life, because right now your sight is witnessing none else but the beginning and the end , the alpha and the omega, the reason to all existence, the creator of all yet the destructor of many......... "
-le me " ..."
-anonymous chick " the foundation to all construction, the one feared by her enemies and loved by her friends, the hero of times......"
-le me " .........."
-anonymous chick " I am your father ! "
That was it . the moment i heard this lame joke from the 90s, was the moment i decided to just walk away. I couldn t bear anymore with the randomly ridicule existence of her character so i decided to just ignore it, my exhaustion winning over my curiosity, and find a different park where no such being would disturb me.
But at the third step i took away from her, i stopped. No i don think you get it. i literally stopped . My body stood up at an impossible stance, one foot mid air , hanging there like a decoration , or more precisely like a grotesque statue; i was immobilized.
When i thought this situation couldn t get anymore surprising, well it got even more surprising. having lost control of my body was quite a shock for me, but losing control over the whole situation made me panic.
Even though i knew that i was paralyzed, in a desperate attempt, i tried to look back at her , Expecting an explanation. Using all my willpower, i somehow managed to turn my head and look behind me, but i got disappointed: there was no one.
how was that possible ? she was there just 2 second ago. Did she go away? If she did i would have least been able to distinguish a figure far away. But aside from the from trees , benches and thoses sands squares kids plays in, i saw nothing.... And i was still immobile....
No one was around to help me get away from my current pitiful state. It was the first time i wished to feel the presence of someone else. Not knowing when i would be free from this damned spell, I panicked even more; would i be stuck in this uncomfortable position for the rest of my life ? as i am about to start freaking out , i hear a familiar voice.
-anonymous chick " fufufu.... where are you looking at ? "
She was in front of me. the way she acted was if as she had been there the whole time, and as if i just had lost my senses of reality for the past thirty seconds. I actually wished it was the case, but the fact that i was still immobilized forced me the face the unwanted truth. Desperate to know more about this truth, i ask
-le me : Just.... who are you? ..... what do you want from me ?
-anonymous chick : you aren t a good listener are you ? didn t i already tell ?, the alpha and the omega , the reason to all existence , the creator of all yet the destructor of many......... "
angered by her not taking me seriously, interrupt:
-le me : dammit you stupid cunt ! cut it out !
I should not have said that. The moment i insulted her, the smile she had on her face, a smile i thought was immortal, slowly faded..... along with my ability to breathe..... the paralysis suddenly affected my lunges, rendering them as useless. Air was still flowing into the organs , but it left the same way it would pass through and empty cavern. Taken by surprise, I instinctively started pointlessly gargling....... As i try to beg for help, the bubble of spit formed into my mouth by my desperate attempts to burn oxygen into my metabolism, blocks the sound output of my vocal chords, leaving me mute, or should i say making me similar to a broken sink, doing incomprehensible wet sounds....... Paralyzed and and suffocated, i lose hope and fall into desperation....... Witnessing my broken state, taking pleasure in my pain.... She sadistically smile back.
-anonymous chick : i would have enjoyed teasing you more, but i d rather not make the main entertainment wait too much....
-anonymous chick : fufufufu.......well.... have fun i your next life......
This is the last thing i heard before i died... scared to death, i wet my pant, displaying, even at my last hour, how pathetic i am. My consciousness start to fade away. my eyes slowly closing, the last thing i see is the twisted face of my murderer, smiling a perverted way, almost as if aroused by my demise....... Asphyxiated by *the omnipotent being* i get drown by a newly formed storm, in a objected and subjective way..... *rain really does sucks*.... is my last thought..................................................